I spotted this memoir on a shelf at one of my favorite book stores on Kauai. At first I thought it was a comedy — "The Book of Help" as a title, plus all these chapters on different remedies seemed amusing because so many of us (perhaps all of us, in our own ways) seek solace, understanding, and tools for moving through life among quite the array of healing and self-discovery modalities, from ancient to modern and everything in between. I certainly have!

 

WHY I CHOSE THIS BOOK

As I initially flipped through the book, my next thought was that the author simply devised a brilliant framework for a book, one I would perhaps have liked to have written myself, especially as someone who has tried and studied all kinds of healing modalities throughout my life and healing journey thus far. That, plus the vibrant cover art, made me buy it. I thought: If nothing else, beyond relating to the healing modalities she mentions that I too have explored, I can observe her book as a writer, and gather inspiration (or lessons) for how I will write books of my own. (I am a big fan of learning everything I can from all my experiences and of reverse-engineering anything that interests me, by the way. If you ask me, if you are called to create something, go experience and learn from the gifts, mistakes, and moves of others who have created similar things. It's a wonderful way to learn.)

 

WHAT I FOUND WHEN I BEGAN TO READ

What I found in the book when I actually gave it a read was much more of an exploration of a broken family and the frustrating unraveling of a challenging and failed marriage, which was not what I had anticipated, nor was it a central theme that would not have attracted me to it had I known initially. That being said, throughout the book I also found myself laughing and marking passages from her lifelong healing journey adventure, making note of deeply self-aware and moving moments in the author's growth that I and anyone reading this book could relate to and potentially learn from as well.

 

WHAT TO EXPECT

With this memoir, Megan Griswold offers us an unflinchingly honest look at her life, which takes an immense amount of courage to not only learn how to do but to also to share publicly in a format that anyone — her own ex and family members included — can read. I commend her for that. Anyone who can be that honest is working very hard to heal and also being deeply generous, in a way, by sharing their own mistakes, shortcomings, moments of discovery, and hard-earned wisdom from the journey.

 

I didn't immediately share about or recommend this book because I wanted to complete it myself first, in order to have my own first-hand take on the overall experience reading it. I created this "What I'm Reading" series to share books that have contributed to my own creative and entrepreneurial journey and that offer us inspiration, connection, and expansion. Having finished it, I can give it my stamp of approval that it does all of those things, and it is an enriching and at times entertaining read for any soul who is seeking.

 

A FEW OF MY FAVORITE QUOTES AND PASSAGES

Here are a few of my favorite quotes, passages, and points of interest from the text:

 

• [such a clear description of the lost and restless feelings of our early 20s] —
  

  “I want to turn my world upside down. […] I hang this idea that climbing around on glaciers and paddling across big, broad water and speaking a language not native to me is what it would mean to be shaken up.”
  

 

• [her description of looking at wilderness guiding brochures and feeling called] —
  

  “It’s as though I believe that some part of me that needs resurrecting will be found in those photographs. Something about the harsh-looking weather, the thick storm gear. That stormy weather matches something in my interior.”

 

• [on the experience of seeking wilderness leadership training to find herself] —
  

  “Suddenly, my external experience matched my internal one — not just on the inside, but technically lost in the outside. For the first time, my nervous system could rest. And I had company. A whole group of people navigating along with me.”

• [on the powerful effect of nature on the body and being] —
  

  “I wonder whether my molecules are being rearranged in response to the beauty."
  

 

• [as an Ashtanga yoga practitioner and teacher myself, I especially appreciate her description of Ashtanga yoga Mysore style classes] —
  

  “It’s six a.m. The room is dark and warm. Walking into practice is like burrowing into a seashell, as the students’ Ujjayi breath technique sounds like the ocean.”

 

• [the self-awareness of this is monumental, and important for anyone who needs to establish healthy boundaries] —
  

  “In the face of a need of mine not met in a primary relationship, I compensated by meeting the other’s need as if it were my own so I could experience a need fulfilled, stealing the nourishment that was not mine.”

 

• [a note of my own on two of my favorite healing modalities that the author tries and describes] —
  I love that she describes and shares her experiences in doing both IFS (Internal Family Systems) and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) work with her therapists. These has been transformative in my own life as well.

 

• [insights while seeing her mother's decline] —
  

  “That was where I spent my time. My interior was mapping a way out for her. That was the idea, that to make a way out for her would lead to a map for a way out for me. […] she couldn’t ask for help. Because that would mean she needed somebody. And my mother made it her business to never need anybody, and because of that she couldn’t have needed anybody more.”

 

• [showing a moment of how family is at times so challenging and so complex] — 

  “Renee and her family will be moving in by the thirty-first. And she will call this place home. I am happy for her. But that does not translate. And so Renee wants all traces of me gone by the thirty-first. I don’t know why this is. It just is. I suspect I’m a safe place to pack the anger. A reminder of a family that got fractured. By divorce, disease. And one particularly face (mine) and hers to me, an echo of that family that didn’t quite work.”

 

• [her closing remarks and true desires, realized as the book concludes] — 
  "Protection. Nourishment. Comfort. In the end, it’s not that complicated.”

 

AS A FINAL THOUGHT OVERALL

I hope you enjoy this read, if it calls to you. I found it endearing, challenging, amusing, and deeply human. It's also a nice tour through some very interesting modalities for self-discovery and healing, if you're curious. I wouldn't say the author's take is the end-all-be-all, but she does give us a courageous, honest, and personal look into her own experience.

 

Happy reading,

 

XX

 

 

PS: You can explore all past "What I'm Reading" recommendations here.

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