As floral artists, we are naturally linked to gatherings and celebrations. Whether you are arranging flowers for a client's wedding or for your own dining table, we craft floral arrangements to brighten spaces and to invite mood and delight to share with others. After all, it is flowers that bring gatherings to life, quite literally.

Always when I am arranging (or teaching), I am focused on the atmosphere we are creating or the experience we are writing in the language of flowers across a space where people gather. I also happen to love hosting gatherings and building community, and so when I came across Priya Parker's book The Art of Gathering, it was an obvious choice to add to my reading list.  

 

WHAT I LOVED ABOUT THIS BOOK

This book is a great balance between research and stories, technical recommendations for gatherings as well as vivid case studies from all kinds of get-togethers from all over the world. I felt inspired by many of the creative ideas, touches, and intentional planning that go into many of the elaborate and specific gatherings described. There are worlds within worlds possible when it comes to how you prepare your guests with the "entryway" of the invitation, how they experience the arrival, what kinds of "agreements" you set up for how the gathering will go to make it intentional and interesting, how themes and guidance for what to wear bring people together, how to inspire connection and meaningful conversation, and how to surprise and wow guests in unique and creative ways that make a gathering unforgettable. Even if you have no intention of hosting a huge or elaborate gathering, ideas from all of the examples provided are sure to inspire fun little additions to your gatherings and celebrations.

A SNAPSHOT OF WHAT'S INSIDE

A great way to take a peek into this book is to have a look at its table of contents. There are eight sections, which I appreciate personally for the association with transformation of the number eight, with several smaller chapters on related ideas within each section. The book does two things with its structure: it invites you into the anatomy of a gathering from priming before arrival through the ways we can make an exit with intention, and it takes you deeper into the vast folds of what's possible across all types of gatherings. Here are the eight overarching sections, to give you a peek inside:

One — Decide Why You're Really Gathering

Two — Close Doors

Three — Don't Be a Chill Host

Four — Create a Temporary Alternative World

Five — Never Start a Funeral with Logistics

Six — Keep Your Best Self Out of My Gathering

Seven — Cause Good Controversy

Eight — Accept That There Is an End

 

 

A FEW OF MY FAVORITE QUOTES AND PASSAGES

A few of my favorite quotes and passages from the book that were most impactful and resonant for me include:

• Le Diné en Blanc — a well-planned, elevated, pop-up picnic dinner where hundreds of invited guests meet in a public park dressed all in white with their own white dinner table, chairs, tableware, and picnic dinner all in tow. What an inspiring idea and amazing now world-wide spectacle of a gathering!

• “90% of what makes a gathering successful is put in place beforehand."

• Asking guests to perform or fulfill a task prior to the gathering as a method of priming them or getting them into the mood of the upcoming event — another wonderful and impactful idea. One example given was to provide a pre-gathering workbook with questions inside to set the tone of the upcoming gathering, such as "What's one experience from before you were 20 that fundamentally impacted the way you look at the world?" 
  
  
  
• Other ideas for guiding gatherings (including workshops and circles, not just dinners and parties) include asking (a) something taht helps them connect with and remember their own sense of purpose ads it relates to the gathering, and (b) something that gets them to share honestly about the nature of the challenge they're trying to address.
  
  
  
• The idea of having a "social contract" for a gathering, which is an agreement that answers this question: What am I willing to give physically, psychologically, financially, emotionally (and otherwise) in return for what I expect to receive? (This shows a really in-depth and intentional way to be aware of and prepare guests for a gathering of any kind.
  
  
  

• “Don't elevate the readying of things over the readying of people."

• “One way to help people leave their other worlds, and enter yours, is to walk them through a passageway." (I particularly love this idea as a floral artist and event designer for the physical experience and impact of walking under an arch or through a floating floral installation, for example, and also as a poet and writer for the figurative passageways a writer creates for their reader. It's a potent element to consider when designing any kind of experience for others to enjoy.

I think all the event designers and community-builders in our community here will very much appreciate this read. Enjoy!

 

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Happy reading,

XX

PS: You can explore more "What I'm Reading" recommendations here.

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